A note for anyone who factors online voices into your decision about what is enjoyable or satisfying
[Note: I promise this is not really an article about Taylor Swift… Unless you want it to be. Then it totally is.]
This week, I am fascinated by the online battle over whether or not Taylor Swift’s new album is any good. I became aware that the album, The Life of a Showgirl, would be dropped this last Friday because of my work colleagues. I’m not a Swiftie myself, but I spend a lot of time with some of them and they took Taylor’s new album release very seriously. As a result, I knew the album was arriving and decided some light trolling in our team Slack channel might be fun. The morning after the album release, I posted this:
In truth, I had not listened to the album and didn’t really intend to. I don’t even remember the last time I heard an album (I’m pretty sure it involved a CD player), and my 14 year old daughter had already warned me that TS is no longer cool at the high school lunch table. When I asked if she would be playing any songs after they came out, my daughter said “no” and politely asked me to avoid telling her friends that anyone in our family ever found Taylor Swift appealing.
Still, like one of those songs you initially think is silly but end up humming all day, the idea of listening to this album stuck with me. I played the first part while I walked my dog, and the second when I cleaned the kitchen. I turned it on while I was getting ready for bed, and it was playing at the gym while I worked out the next morning. Before long, I’d heard the whole album more than once… and I liked it.
I don’t think this album is amazing or anything. It’s not even my favorite from TS, but I enjoy it. It makes me smile and is a nice distraction from less fun things going on in the world. After I decided I liked the album, I decided to look and see how it was being reviewed. That was a mistake.
The online reviews of this album are truly a strange mixture of adoration and disgust. Some people love this album and have a real problem with those who do not (and vice versa). The vitriol and the ecstasy poured out online in articles, posts, and comments is intense, to say the least. What’s most interesting is how much people with strong feelings care about the opinions of those who don’t agree with them. It’s as if having people say the album is either good or bad will actually make it so.
As I read through this battle, I realized there seems to be an unspoken belief that reaching an online consensus equals arriving at the truth. Many of us care about what others think to the point that we can’t seem to experience true enjoyment unless “the tribe” blesses our activity. I can’t help but wonder if I went online to look for reviews because I myself was seeking this cultural stamp of approval.
The need for outside approval of ideas and activities that we have found enjoyable (and unharmful to others) just doesn’t make any sense. The power we give to others when we allow their opinions to dictate our happiness is misguided. Many of us have been conditioned by tech and media to believe that what happens online is profoundly important and we should thus pay attention. Consequently, the opinions of strangers have become the standard for judging what we should find pleasurable. This intense pressure to adopt such a mindset, fueled by those who gain from our online presence, undermines our ability to live life by our own ideas of what is gratifying.
Regardless of whether you ever listen to Taylor Swift’s new album, I hope that you will find enjoyment in your life that doesn’t need the approval of strangers. I hope that you will have the self confidence to decide what is pleasing to you, and then to savor it. And most of all, I hope you find peace by listening to your inner voice and ignoring outside distractions, no matter if you’re enjoying music, reading, watching movies, spending time with loved ones, or running your veterinary practice. We all should have the ability to decide for ourselves what makes us satisfied and how we want to fill our days.
