Cherie Buisson, DVM, CHPV

When I have a patient in the hospital, here are my requirements:

– They have to have pain control
– They have to have food
– They have to be well hydrated
– They have to be eliminating normally
– They have to rest
– They have to be as physically and mentally comfortable as possible
– They have to get touched in a loving, non-medical way unless that causes them stress.

And yet, I will get to noon and realize I’m completely parched and my water bottle is untouched at my desk. I will suddenly need to pee and realize I haven’t visited the bathroom in hours (sometimes all day). I will get dizzy and realize I haven’t eaten and my blood sugar is bottoming out.

What is it with us being so dense? We wouldn’t tolerate our patients being dehydrated. We stress when we can’t get them the fluids they need.

In order to tolerate the emotional rollercoaster that is veterinary medicine (I hate roller coasters – this should have been my first clue that I was in trouble) we need certain things. And when the chips are down, these vital things are the first to be bypassed in order to accumulate more stress.

1. Sleep: We love science SO MUCH and then refuse to believe what it keeps telling us. Getting enough sleep is essential to your health. Some of us can’t sleep due to stress. This makes stress worse. And the avalanche begins….
2. Eat healthy food: Put good nutrition into your body. My husband and I call it RF (real food). What would you want your patients eating? Put the people equivalent in your mouth.
3. Drink water: Water, people. I know alcohol seems great and so does soda, but this is doing nothing to make you healthier. Water is the one thing your body doesn’t have to burn off or detoxify to use. Fill ‘er up!
4. Exercise: I know. But do it. Because science, just like #1. I promise you, this will improve your life, your ability to handle stress and keep you healthier. You don’t have to be a freak about it, but if you make sure you get some exercise during the week, it will help you cope. You have time. Maybe don’t raise your blood pressure reading the comments on social media. Go for a walk instead.
5. Yeah, I’m going there. Not just sex, but intimacy: We need touch. We need stress relief. We need to have some focus somewhere other than our brains. We need connection with other people.  If you live alone, then snuggle and cuddle your pets. Do not check their gum color. Do not check their hydration. Don’t palpate them in any way. Hug a friend or family member. Hold on tight. If you’re completely alone, go have a massage. Go to the shelter and pet a kitty. Or stretch your body gently, take a hot bath or have a little intimate fun on your own. Uncomfortable yet? Good. Go do it. Don’t make me tell you this again. I swear, I’ll devote an entire article to it.

Think back on all the times you deliberately decided to do stressful things rather than these 5 things. How often were the stressful things necessary?  Did accomplishing them alleviate your stress or just give you more? You’ve got one life to live. Don’t spend it doing things you hate (except exercise – do that).  I promise you, if you start doing these 5 COMPLETELY BASIC self-care tasks, handling the stressful stuff will become easier. Let me know how you do. Except for #5 – you can keep that to yourself!

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the position of the DrAndyRoark.com editorial team.

I often think of the things that drove me from private practice. The unpredictable hours, physical strain, abusive and manipulative people all played a part in my decision to limit the time I spend in the clinic. Like most associates and relief veterinarians, I had fantasies about what I would change if I owned a practice. Of course, all those decisions in the real world would have had consequences as opposed to how perfectly they worked in my mind.

Sometimes I wonder what would happen if we as veterinary professionals banded together and decided we were going to be different. What if we made a pact to stop allowing (within reason) those things that result in burnout and cause resignation letters to fly? If we all stopped tolerating bad (I mean really bad) behavior, where would the badly behaved go?

1. Client behavior was the number one reason that I left private practice.

I was hurt from being called heartless, money grubbing and cruel. I am none of those things, and I was sick to death of being labeled by people who didn’t know me and didn’t care that I was a human being trying to do her job the best she could. Now, we all have plenty of clients who can be unpleasant. I’m not talking about them. I’m talking about those few, really demanding, soul-sucking, trouble-causing clients that cause your staff to evacuate the room when their number shows up on caller ID. What if we sat down in our respective staff meetings and asked our staff which clients make them not want to come to work and then FIRED those clients? Here’s what I think would happen: Our staff would be grateful and relieved to not have to face dealing with someone who is abusive. We could give more positivity to our good clients, encouraging them to stay with us. We could retain our staff members because we have shown them that no client is more important to us than our team. We could reduce compassion fatigue in our practices.

2. So many teams have that one staff member who just makes life difficult for everyone else.

We’ve all dealt with bullies, whiners and slackers. What would happen if we held our teams to a really high standard (because we respect them as the amazing veterinary professionals that they are) and released anyone who couldn’t or wouldn’t meet that standard? What if, above all things, we cherished our team and only allowed the best players? I think what would happen is everyone would work hard to make sure they weren’t next in line to be let go. I think we’d have more demand for more excellent staff members.

3. What if we refused to work for people who were abusive?

If those doctors and practice managers who enjoy kicking staff members around the office on a daily basis had trouble hiring excellent staff, they’d either change their tune or be stuck with the employees we fired in #2.

4. What if we said “no”?

What if we set our boundaries for the way we allow other people to treat us? What if we politely and firmly referred clients elsewhere if they want us to practice medicine in a way that goes against our principles? I don’t mean the client who can’t afford the “A” plan and must settle for plan “B” or “C”. I mean the client who insists that you go along with their grain-free, vaccine-free, coconut oil plan and declines everything you recommend. I’m talking about the client who insists you do hours of research on a regular basis on some supplement or food they found on the internet and then tells you they’re going to feed it regardless of your recommendation. This is not a good fit. Clients have the right to decide how they are going to treat their pet. However, they do not have the right to tell you what kind of medicine you practice. If you and your client can’t see eye-to-eye, then it’s time to motivate them to find a veterinarian who can.

5. What if we had a “vet-friendly” practice?

What if we designed our practice hours and staffing around our team and made sure they were able to function healthily every day? What if we held our lunch hour as sacred and stuck as much as possible to our closing time? Before you say this is unrealistic, I have worked for practices that do this, and they are very successful.

There is a feeling of helplessness in our profession that comes from knowing that our daily practice is out of our control. Most of us have seen the bumper sticker: “Veterinary medicine – saving lives and getting yelled at”. WHY? If toughing it out is leading so many of our number to suicide, why on earth aren’t we willing to try making our practice a nicer place to work? Surely it is better to try creating boundaries and see how that works before giving up on practice – or our lives.

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the position of the DrAndyRoark.com editorial team.

Negativity is like ringworm. Sometimes it’s so subtle you can’t see it. Just knowing you’ve been exposed to it can make you itchy. And sometimes you don’t know you have it till it breaks out all over you.

It’s easy to get sucked into the negativity, especially when we spend so much time hearing from the public that we’re “in it for the money” or from experts that the veterinary profession is grossly and hopelessly underpaid. If you hear that you’re worthless often enough, not only do you start to believe it, you start to repeat it. Worse, it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. Before long, we’re complaining and comparing sob stories. No one wants to appear too happy.

Let’s quit cold turkey –  stop complaining and start making changes. So, what do we change? Who do we change?  Look in the mirror. THAT’s who you change!

Somewhere along the line, it became “cool” for veterinary professionals to suffer. If you weren’t working 60 hours a week, taking calls on weekends and nursing an ulcer, you might as well hang up your stethoscope. I remember doing an externship and seeing a bottle of antacids on every doctor’s desk. I decided right then and there that I didn’t want to be that kind of veterinarian.  16 years and many bottles of antacids later, I can happily say I used to be that veterinarian. Well, most days anyway.

How did I do it? Well, I removed myself from the “who’s the most miserable?” competition.

Instead, I threw my hat into the “who can be the most peaceful and happy?” ring. Here are some situations in which you can spare yourself some negativity:

• I used to cringe when I’d go on vacation, because inevitably someone would snort and say “Must be nice. I can’t ever take time off”. I used to feel guilty hearing that. Now, I’m just grateful that I’m not that important! No one calls you from work with good news while you’re on vacation. Even if you can’t completely detach, make an effort to turn off the phone, even if it’s just a few hours at a time.  I still have to wean myself off of phone duty when I go on vacation, but I don’t keep it strapped to my body in case someone wants to overstep the vacation boundary.

• When Hurricane Katrina hit, I was watching the news almost constantly. I’m from Louisiana and have friends and family all over the areas that were destroyed. During that time, my TV was my alarm clock. I woke up to a popular morning news show. I often woke up angry. One morning, the anchor asked a New Orleans politician when the electricity was going to be turned back on. He replied incredulously that the city was under water and that it probably wouldn’t be a good idea. That’s when it hit me: I was waking up angry because all this negativity (and stupidity) was getting in my head before I was even fully awake! I started waking up to music and avoiding the news. This removed an incredible amount of negativity from my day. Whenever my husband and I cave and watch the news, we are distinctly less happy and positive than on the nights we skip tuning in.

• We all know people who thrive on complaining. Whether in person or on social media, these energy vampires can suck the life out of you – if you let them. We can’t change these people, we can only change our own behavior. “Unfriend” and “hide” are good strategies online and in person. Everyone with whom you choose to spend your time should make your life better. If you can’t avoid them completely, limit the time you spend with them.

• I can’t think of a single person I admire and want to get to know better who is negative. As I work to back away from negative people in my circle, I also try to reach out to those who make my life better. Call a few people who energize you and schedule a lunch, drinks or some other activity. It will give you something to look forward to when the going gets rough!

• Negativity is inside all of us. It’s like the closet in the house that is full of junk. We keep saying we’re going to have that garage sale, but the pile keeps getting bigger. Meditation, exercise, laughter and rest all help empty the closet. Confiding in someone can be useful as well – just bear in mind that wallowing in a problem or rehashing it over and over makes things worse. Don’t stand in front of the closet complaining about it. Say a few choice words and then get to work!

Face negativity just like you do ringworm in the clinic.

Put on your protective gear, avoid exposure to anyone spreading spores and if you see a suspicious spot, don’t ignore it. If you think you’ve caught a case of negativity, dip yourself in happy things. Don’t indulge in your favorite sad songs. I can ugly cry at Steel Magnolias with the best of them, but when I’m feeling down, I’m going to watch something funny. Count your achievements, make a gratitude list or do something nice for someone else. Get a hug from someone. Go look at something pretty.  Above all, try not to bring the infection home to your loved ones. Strip off all your doom and gloom and pour bleach on it before you go inside. It won’t be long before you no longer have to think about gravitating toward the positive.  All that reward you get from pursuing the happiness in your life will make you seek it automatically.

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the position of the DrAndyRoark.com editorial team.

After my divorce, I had to trade in a car I really loved for something less expensive. There were several people who would have gone to the dealership with me, but I chose to go alone. As luck would have it, I encountered an extremely aggressive sales team. When I told them the price wasn’t right for me and stood up to leave, their “closer” actually moved to the doorway and blocked my exit. If memory serves, he told me to “sit down and sign so we can be done with this”.  I bought the car despite the price being more than I wanted. I left the dealership in my brand new car, pulled over and burst into tears.

In retrospect, I can laugh at this. The physical intimidation of a young woman by a group of men isn’t funny. What’s funny to me is that I had no concept of my own power.   If someone tried to do that to me now, they’d be in for a world of trouble. In the nine years since that incident, I’ve learned to speak up, not be afraid to make a scene and deliver pain if someone puts their hands on me without my consent. I had the basic idea right – you have to be willing to walk away – but I allowed them to convince me that walking away wasn’t an option. Can you imagine what they would have done if I’d pulled out my cell phone and called 911?

Our power lies in our choices. While the behavior of those men was reprehensible, I had no control over it. What I did have control over was my own behavior. I allowed them to intimidate me into believing that I couldn’t leave. Did I really think they would physically restrain me if I pushed past them out the door? Well, somewhere deep down, I must have.

I talk to many veterinary professionals who feel trapped. Whether it’s a bad clinic or a bad personal relationship, they feel despair because they “can’t leave”.  You CAN leave. The kicker is, there are consequences to leaving. If you can accept or head off those consequences, then there’s no situation where you have to feel stuck. If you are proactive, you are never stuck anywhere, and that gives you an immense amount of power.

•  Build a savings account and make it a priority. Make sure you have the money to leave if you so desire. Better yet, have enough that you can leave immediately and decide your next step later.

•  Find your voice. Often bullies will continue their activities because we don’t speak up. “It’s not ok for you to _______.” is a great start to setting boundaries. Say it calmly and firmly. “It’s not ok for you to talk to me like that”.  It’s a complete sentence. You can wait for a response or walk away. Stop worrying whether other people are going to be angry or upset because you are taking care of yourself. You’re already angry and upset, so they can join the club. Who knows, they may decide that fixing their behavior is better than having to be called out for it.  If they don’t, you can terminate your relationship.  You’re better off without someone who is being abusive.

•  Start looking. If you are in a situation that you don’t like, start researching options. This is the hardest part of unsticking yourself. I think we are afraid to look because we’ll feel compelled to do something besides complain. If you don’t wait until you are dangerously miserable before taking action, you will need less healing time when you decide to make your move.

•  Ask for help and support. Business advisors, friends, family and therapists can all help you to make the decision and balance emotion with logic. However, don’t let any one person (other than yourself) have too much say. Ultimately, the choice is yours to make.

•  Make a plan. Put down in writing the steps to reach your goal. You don’t have to have it all figured out, just enough to give you direction and focus. If you veer from the path, go over the plan again and decide if you are still committed to it. Then get back on the path and move forward.

You can make your life whatever you choose. Please don’t stay in a bad situation until you feel your only way out is to do something drastic. Change doesn’t have to happen all at once. Celebrate even the smallest victory.  If you take a step in the right direction, remember to pat yourself on the back. We know positive reinforcement works for our patients. Let it work for you, too. Click the clicker and give yourself a cookie for taking care of you.

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the position of the DrAndyRoark.com editorial team.

Welcome back to Humans of the Clinic, our newest column at DrAndyRoark.com. Our goal is to feature a person you know through your work who inspires you in any way great or small; it can be anyone- a co-worker, a client, a teacher, a mentor, an employee, some guy you see out in the parking lot. Today, one of our featured writers, Dr. Cherie Buisson, shares the story of the type of vet we all hope and pray to work with someday.

This month, my hero and mentor is retiring. I grew up a few blocks from her home and climbed her trees as a kid. I had no idea how much influence she would have over my veterinary career. Deborah Edwards opened the first feline-only practice in the southeast.

People said she was crazy. “Something like that will never work,” they said (incidentally, don’t ever say this to Deb – you’ll end up looking really stupid). This year she sold her very successful feline practice and gracefully weaned herself off of work.  Though we haven’t worked a shift together in many years, I still feel as though we are saying goodbye. Luckily, we are friends outside the office and will spend lots of time eating lunch and quilting together in the future.

Deb taught me how to be the feline veterinarian I am today. There was no question too stupid or ill-timed for her to answer patiently. To this day, I ask her about radiographs or blood results that confound me. Sometimes her only answer is “Well, that’s bizarre”, which is a comfort.

One day early in my career, I ran back to her office during a dental procedure. I was panicked and almost in tears. “I put ear flush in Oliver’s eyes instead of eye flush,” I gasped. Deb turned to me (with perfect calm) and said, “Ooooh, I hate it when that happens.” Then we talked about what I should do to fix it (I had already done it), and she assured me it would be fine (it was).

When a notoriously difficult client blew up at me while she was out of town, she was horrified. When she got home, she put an arm around me and said “I put a loaded gun in your hands. I’m so sorry. You didn’t do anything wrong.”  When a board complaint followed soon after, she walked me through it safely to the other side.

She is everything a mentor should be. Her compassion, humor and humility make her an amazing teacher. There is no fear in learning from her because you are never punished for not knowing. Even better, you are never allowed to take yourself too seriously. She will honestly tell you her mistakes and problems and commiserate with you over your own.

I’m glad she’s getting some time to just enjoy her life and family, but I can’t help feeling that veterinary medicine is losing a treasure. Luckily, those of us who benefitted from her teaching get to mentor the next generation. We will do our best to pass along her wisdom and wit while she sits back and watches, hopefully with a glass of wine in her hand.

Help us get the word out about all the amazing people in our world! Do you have a person you want to recognize for having an impact? Send us a photo and their story at editor@drandyroark.com with “HOTC Submission” in the subject line.

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the position of the DrAndyRoark.com editorial team.

When I heard about the fire at our local park, I was shocked and upset. My husband and I ride our bikes or walk through that park almost every morning. We have friends there – both animal and human. I worried for the bunnies, birds and squirrels as well as the proud pines and palmettos. The first time I saw the scars, I wanted to cry. I was grateful that it was only part of the park, but the fact that it was damaged at all hurt my heart.

Forest fires are actually a beneficial force of nature. They clean up debris and even make some seeds sprout.  Sometimes controlled burns are used by people to stop invasive species. We’re taught from a young age to fear and respect fire but also that it can keep us warm.

In our lives, we get burned. Bad things happen. Bad people happen. We make mistakes. For me, an out-of-the-blue divorce was my forest fire. I was devastated. It was a long time before I felt like myself again. I learned from that time more than any other in my life. I found out who my real friends were. I discovered people I thought I barely knew really cared enough to call, send a card or stop by. I bonded with my younger brother who took me out for sushi.  I realized I had a stubborn streak and a backbone.

It’s taken almost a decade, but I can finally say that I’m incredibly grateful for my divorce. I wouldn’t be the person I am today if that part of me hadn’t been burned to ashes. What grew in its place was better than I could have imagined. I lived alone for a year. I got to just be me without explanation or apology. I went crazy and painted, redecorated – I made my house my own. Don’t get me wrong – I suffered. I lost 10 pounds in the first few months because I couldn’t stomach much beyond scrambled eggs and oatmeal. I cried until my face had what seemed to be permanent gouges (they weren’t).  I had to be treated for anxiety.

It was all worth it.

I know myself better now. I see my strengths and my flaws and (try to) embrace both. I chose to keep walking forward until I found my happy again. The most important thing I learned was that I wouldn’t go back and tell myself not to get married. I wouldn’t trade all the good things that happened for the ability to avoid the pain, and that’s a really, really big deal.

Less than a month after the park burned, my husband and I walked hand-in-hand through the damage. The tree trunks were black, and I could still smell the smoke. The grove was unusually quiet; the squirrels and birds had not returned. Then I looked closer. Here and there were bursts of green where the stubborn palmettos gave the fire the finger and grew again. Each week, there was more vibrant, verdant foliage. While the scars will remain for a long time, the desolation didn’t last. The forest moved on because it didn’t know any better.

We know. The knowing and the fear of the future hold us back. If we just make a plan to put one foot in front of the other and give ourselves a chance to heal, we can find happiness again. Or even find it for the first time. The fire happened in March. Here’s what the area looked like in June.  That tall grass? It wasn’t there before – it’s new and beautiful. The blackness of the tree bark actually makes the green of the grass more vivid.

My husband is fond of saying “everyone gets something”. Whether it’s cancer, the loss of a parent, a failed marriage or getting fired, you will have to play the cards you are dealt. If you can survive the bad things that happen, you can reinvent yourself with an entirely new supply of wisdom at your disposal. You can become more vivid, more solid and stronger than you ever thought possible. You can become less afraid. Once the worst in your life has happened to you, you realize you don’t have to be scared of what’s to come. You gain confidence knowing you can face it and come out the other side.

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the position of the DrAndyRoark.com editorial team.